Chapter 28: 2008 Resolutions

Every year, I try to think of new year's resolutions. This year, I think I may not label them not only as resolutions, but as points to ponder. Here they are:

1. I want to find and continue to do things that make me happy. I have very little time to myself as I work two jobs, I go to school at night, and I co-chair an organization for girls in my community. Even though I have lived by myself for 4 years now, I still don't know many of the things that make me happy. This is not because I don't want to, but simply because I haven't had a lot of time to do so. Whenever I get free time I am trying to go to sleep. In 2008, I want to do what truly makes me happy, not just what is necessary to reach my goals.

2. Of course...excercise is on the list! I'm not sure when, but I would like to try. :)

3. Get a dog...preferably after graduation. I think I want a long-haired daschund.

3b. Graduate in May!!! Pass the CPCE exam in February.

4. Allow myself time to heal or grieve things. I am often on the move so much until I don't take the time to grieve or heal. It is very easy to be so busy being strong, but one can forget to be human. I can be prideful at times and subconsciously say to myself "I refuse to cry about this" or "I am not a punk," or even say that I forgive the person and I accept what happened, but I forget to whole-heartedly think about what I'm feeling at the time.

5. Travel. I work a lot and I don't have much money, but I would like to travel more. I really, really loved my vacation in the Bahamas. It is something that I will never forget and for that reason, I know that I should take the time that I have now to see the world--literally. I would like to put a plan in motion to go to Europe or at least Canada...in other words out of the country... in 2009. As for 2008, I want to simply travel...where...I don't really know.

6. Go out with people my age. I am the youngest person in my chapter of my sorority, the youngest in my book club, and one of the youngest on my job. I don't like being reminded that I am young. I simply want to have 26 year old fun. I'm not sure how I am going to achieve this, but I would like to try. I work a lot, I'm in school, and I don't meet many people my age, but I am going to make a conscious effort to do this.

7. Join a church. I have been attending one church for the last 4 years, but I have visited another church for 2 of those 4 years. I would like to join myself to one body because I believe that having an established church home is important. I am still waiting on God to give me direction on this.

8. Accept people for who they are without getting angry because they can't do what I believe is right by me. No people are not always fair or kind, but I do know that I can continue to go about my way without questioning myself by saying why are they doing this to me, etc. People are being as good as they can be...some people (as my mom would say,) can't get no gooder. When folk act like this with me, I understand that I don't have to allow them into my circle and I also don't have to be a reactive person. I sincerely don't believe that I should allow another person to openly make me loose my cool and "go off" or react to their stupid or immature behavior. It is what it is and it is okay for me not to have many people in my space. I think I do well with this, but I would like to to continue to do so.

9. Decide whether I will consistently go to my hair dresser.

10. Get a good job in counseling. With this in mind, I want to find out where I want to live. I have to get out of my area. I know that there is something greater for me out there...just not sure where yet. In school counseling, I want to develop programs that will help minorities students academically and to push them to develop a greater sense of self.

11. Catch up on reading things that I want to read. I still haven't read "Confessions of a Video Vixen!"

12. Refuse to seek unwise counsel!!!! I think that I do a good job of this, but I want to continue that mode of thinking. Not everyone can help you when you need it, be supportive when you need them to be, or simply give a damn when you need them to. It is not because they don't want to, it is simply because they can't. It doesn't mean they are bad people, just not the right ones to take counsel or advice from. That in itself is a hard pill to swallow, but it can be done. God is the perfect source. I have learned that he will answer prayers in a fraction of a second if need be. The words "wonderful counselor" never meant so much until 2007. In 2008 it will continue to be so.

I think that is all for now. I already "seek the kingdom of God and his righteousness," I truly believe that everything else will follow....including a good man and all of the other things that I dream of. Happy New Year and God bless!!!!