Chapter 40: So Tired....

Okay, so I just have to say it. I'm tired as hell! I find myself sleeping so much. I know it is because I have been working so hard and so much. My body is trying to catch up with itself and I sleep for hours at a time. It feels good, but it is that ridiculous sleep. I feel so sleepy even afterward. It does feel good, however to be able to clean my house and to do some things that I haven't had time to do in a while. :) Another thing that I am tired of as well, however is the fact that eventhough I work extremely hard, it's almost like it doesn't even matter. It's crazy. There is so much truth in the fact that you have to encourage yourself. It has become more and more clear to me that people can hate or not care simply for the fact that they just want to hate. It's not really personal all of the time. It's the person's way of controlling things that they may not have control over.

Chapter 39: GRADUATION!!!!!!! :)

I have spent the last year of my degree program blogging about my experiences...be them good or bad. I have really enjoyed this. I discovered that I really do love to write and that this is one of the things that has really been missing in my life. The Notebook has officically been my friend through some interesting situations. I am so proud to say that I am graduating!!! FINALLY! I will have my Master's of Education Degree. Wow. It seems crazier when I actually write it out. I will have letters after my name....M.Ed! I'm so thankful. I was thinking about when I first moved here. I moved to this area just to go to school. I knew very few people, didn't have a church or a doctor. Now, I am co-sponsor of an auxillary with my sorority, I actively attend church, I have a good hair dresser, I am a member of a book club, I work full time as a teacher, and this year, I successfully completed an internship as a middle school counselor while working two jobs, one of which is at a private college. I think that I am more proud of myself than anyone else. It feels good to do the exact opposite of what is expected of you. I have been told alot about what people thought of me or what I won't or can't do and I have been able to sustain a positive attitude in the midst of adversity quite well. I understand now when people say that when things get tougher, God is about to move. Lots of good things are happening for me now and I'm really excited. Commencement for me, means a little more than just graduating from my institution, it is the beginning of a new chapter, not only professionally, but personally. I seriously believe that alot of the stress and let downs that I felt previously aren't going to be in the forefront of my life. Yes, there will be new things, but I believe that my latter will be greater than my former. Friendships that I had difficulty letting go, I feel more confident in letting go now. It is true that when people show you who they are believe them. The politics of my job, I feel confident in letting much of that go now. I am peace with many things that I wasn't at peace with before. So I say all of that to say, that there are clearly some things that just don't matter anymore. Commencement is my personal step forward.